張瑞涵丶胡嘉芸丶葉嘉雯講於2017年3月10日星期五晚 萬佛城大殿
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Suzanne Zhang:All Buddhas, Bodhisattvas, Venerable Master, Dharma Masters, and Dharma friends, amitofo. I have been listening to many different years’ seniors being up here and talk about their experience with this place. And eventually, after five years, it is now my turn to be here and share my learning with everyone. if there is anything I say that is not according to the dharma, please kindly correct me.
張瑞涵:諸佛菩薩,宣公上人,各位法師,各位善知識:阿彌陀佛!我曾經聽了好多不同屆的畢業生在這裡結法緣,分享他們在聖城的故事。五年後,我最終還是來到了歷屆畢業生所在的位置,來與大家分享我在聖城的經歷以及所學。如果有任何講的不如法的地方,請大家慈悲指正。
Overall, I am very grateful for CTTB, because it allowed me to understand myself more deeply, and it also stimulated some of my potentials that would not have been stimulated if it was not here. Since young, I was always a shy, timid, and introverted person. In my elementary school years, I never dared to raise my hand to answer questions, because I was afraid that others would laugh at me if I were to get the answer wrong.When I was thrown into a group of strangers, I would have been very unconfortable and hide myself in the corners. I would never pro-active at making new friends. Even if I was among a group of friends, I would simply follow them and not hold any opinions of my own. However, CTTB and the people I met here gave me a whole new understanding of myself.
總的來說,我非常感激聖城,因為它讓我更深入的了解了我自己,也激發了我一些在其他地方所不會被激發的潛能。從小以來,我一直是一個很害羞,膽怯,以及內向的人。在我的小學時光裡,我從來不敢在課堂上積極發言,回答老師的問題﹔因為我害怕回答問題錯誤後來自同學們的嘲笑。當我被扔進一堆陌生人裡時,我會十分不自在,到角落裡做一個透明人。我從來不會去主動交朋友。在朋友中,我也非常沒有主見,總是隨波逐流。但是,聖城和我在這裡遇到的人們,讓我對自己的認知有了翻天覆地的改變。
Actually, even before ariving CTTB, it already did its first spell on me: the not so daring me made a very daring decision at the age of twelve, that is to come to CTTB to study alone. Although my mother was always against the idea in the beginning, because of my determination and faith in Buddhism, she eventaully agreed. However, she set up a condition, which was that I had to become independent and hold my own opinions. I promised her and started to make changes slowly.
其實,在沒有來到聖城前,它就讓我踏出了改變的第一步:從來膽小的我,在十二歲的時候做出了一個大膽的決定,那就是隻身來聖城求學。雖然媽媽的態度在開始的時候是處於反對的,但處於我的堅決以及對佛法的信任,她最後還是妥協了。但是,媽媽給出了一個條件,那就是我需要變得獨立和有自己的主見。於是,我答應了她,慢慢的改變自己。
Nevertheless, what changed me the most was classmates’ and teachers’ understanding and help that I received after coming to CTTB. In the beginning, I could not understand a single word during class because of the language barrier. Therefore, in order to carry out classes regularly, many classmates who knew both Chinese and English translated to me every single word that teachers taught during classes. In addition, no matter what I said, people did not laugh at me, instead, they would always encourage me. Slowly, I started to speak up in classes and join class discussions. With everyone’s help, I overcame the language barrier within half a year.
然而,改變我最多的則是來到聖城後同學們以及老師們的包容與幫助。剛開始在課堂上,我一句英文都聽不懂。所以為了正常上課,很多中英文兩門語言都懂的同學,就會幫我把老師說的話一句一句翻譯給我聽。而且,不管我說什麼,同學們都不會嘲笑我,反而給予我很大的鼓勵。我慢慢的開始在課堂上積極發言,參與討論;在大家的幫助下,我在半年中度過了學習一門語言最困難的時光。
But the changes I made did not stop there. In tenth grade, teachers and classmates suggested to me that I should run for class rep. I have never thought of becoming a leader before, and I did not think that I embodied any qualities of a leader. However, people still gave me the chance and the courage. Then, during the summer of my 11th year, I became the head counsellor for summer camp. What I was most grateful was that even though many others could have done better than me, the teachers still trusted me and gave me the responsibility. And it’s now, I became the president of the student body.
但我的改變並沒有就此止步。在十年級時,老師和同學們給了我當班長的建議。之前的我從來沒有想過去當領導者,我不認為我有領導才能,但大家還是給了我這個機會以及勇氣。接下來,我又在十一年級的暑期夏令營做了主輔導員。讓我最感激的是,當時我認為有很多人可以做得比我更好,但老師們還是十分信任的把這個工作交給了我。再然後就是現在,我成為了學生會主席。
I have never though the quiet me before could have grown into the me today. If it was not for CTTB, I might never have discovered this side of myself. Although there are still many improvements to be made, I am trying my best to repay the community that have offered me so much help and support, and to serve others. Within the limited amount of time while I am here, I will help the teachers to take up some responsibilities so that they can take some rest, and I will help the ones that need help just like how people helped me when I needed help to pass down the kindness and compassion. amitofo.
我從來沒有想過從前沉默寡言的我,可以成長為今天的我。如果我沒有來到聖城,我也許永遠不會看見自己的這一面。雖然我還是有很多地方做的不足,但我在盡我最大的努力來回報這個給予了我無數包容與幫助的集體(community), 為大家服務。在接下來的,所剩不多的時間裡,我要幫老師們分擔一些責任,讓他們不用那麼累,幫助其他像我剛來時需要幫助的人,把愛心和慈悲傳遞下去。阿彌陀佛。
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Klare Hu(胡嘉芸):Buddhas, Bodhisattvas, Venerable Master, and Good knowing advisors: Amitabha.
諸佛菩薩,宣公上人,各位善知識:阿彌陀佛!
My name is Klare, and I want to talk a bit about affinities with people and faith in general. When I first came to study here, I thought this place as no more than a school my parents wanted me to come to. Even though I struggled to adapt to the lifestyle here, what I learned about Buddhism and just being human is a pure gem that can never be replaced. If there is one thing I know about this monastery, it is that everyone carries just as much responsibility to live out the ideals of Venerable Master Hua, who I believe to this day is still here with us, and has never left.
我的名字是胡嘉芸。今天我想和大家分享有關因緣和信心的心得。最初來到這裡上學的時候,我一直認為這裡也就不過是我爸媽想要我來的地方。雖然適應這裡的作息和生活的種種是我的一大難關,我在這所學到的東西是個難得的寶玉。如果我從這個道場學會了一件事,那就是每個人都有同等的義務去學習上人的宗旨。我相信到今天,他仍然和我們在這裡,從來沒有離開過。
Two years ago during the summer, I was down in the Bay Area staying with a family friend for a few days. One night, my mother’s friend had gone out of town and her daughter went grocery shopping so I was left alone in the house. To pass time, I began listening to some of Venerable Master Hua’s recorded talks, after which I found a recording of him chanting Earth Store Bodhisattvas’ name.
兩年前的一個暑假,我在灣區媽媽的朋友家借住幾晚。有一天晚上,我媽媽的朋友不在家,他的女兒跑去買東西,留我一個人在家。那時候為了打發時間,我便開始聽上人的語音開示錄。過了不久,我就開始聽上人念誦的地藏菩薩名號。
Sitting on the bed with my eyes closed, a smell of incense began to emanate out of nowhere as he began to recite Earth Store Bodhisattvas’ name. The windows were shut in my room, and my door was closed. Frankly, I didn’t know what to think at the time, so I went out into the hallway to find the source of the incense. But it turned out that the smell of incense came only from within my tiny bedroom that had only one bed, a closet, and a nightstand. I was puzzled, but I went back into sitting to listen to the rest of his chanting. To my surprise, the smell of incense began to fade as his voice faded into the background.
當時我閉者眼睛盤腿坐在床上,在聽上人念誦地藏菩薩名號的當下,突然間莫名的聞到香炷的味道。那時我房間裡的窗戶和門都是緊閉的。於是我走出了房間去尋找那炷香味道的來源。結果後來發現,那個香的味道只有在我的小房間裡才有。當上人的聲音淡出的時候,那個香炷的味道也就慢慢的消失了。
To me, it wasn’t just a coincidence or a superstition. To me, it was Venerable Master reminding us that we should never lose faith in our principles, religion, and most importantly, in ourselves and our ability to do good.
對我來說,這並不只是巧合抑或是迷信,更是來自上人的提醒,讓我們時刻警記不可以放棄對自己能夠行善的信心,以及對信仰和價值觀的追求。
Over the years, I was met with many difficult situations. Sometimes I doubt my beliefs, sometimes I was bombarded with family complications, and other times I find myself sandwiched between contradictions. What helped me through these difficult times was having a stern faith that everything will eventually be okay. CTTB has taught me a lot of things, among them the perseverance and importance of faith in our lives. As a community, we have to have trust in one another and the willingness to forgive another when someone has done we wrong.
在時間的長河中,我也遇到了一些逆境,以及家人之間的問題。最終卻是心裏秉持的信念給予了我一直以來無形的幫助。在聖城的尊尊教導中,我學到了許多,其中之一便是要對自己有信心, 並且要堅持這份信心。在這個大家庭中,我們需要做的就是相信彼此,寬恕對方的過失。
As individuals, our faith comes into recognizing our reserve power to do more and to be better than we are now. Every year during New Years, I would hear Venerable Master’s recorded talks during lunch about renewing ourselves, getting rid of our old habits and being diligent on our paths to learn the Buddhadharma. In the modern day, this is the “New Year New Me” hashtag on Instagram that people adopt. However, this faith in renewing ourselves that comes around once a year shouldn’t just be a New Year occasion, but a daily mindset to reinvent ourselves for the better. In my own case, I realized that I should not wait around passively, but instead, try to engage in the present moment to find out what my values were regardless of other people’s passing remarks. I have realized after staying here for so many years, that who I am is also the values I choose to embody, and it will continue to be a lifelong journey to find out what those are.
個人而言, 我們也應該相信自己可以做得更好,從而得以完善。每逢新年,我總是能聽到上人對我們的期盼, 要重塑自我,潛心學習佛法;也就是現在膾炙人口的“新年新自己”。當然,改進自己不應該只是新年該做的事, 更應該是每天的練習。就以我來講,我意識到比起被動而言,也許活在當下並找出存在的意義,同時活出自己是一個更好的選擇。我在聖城學到了很多關於自身的成長,我是誰便成為了我一生想要挖掘的大問題。
Venerable Master taught me that we shouldn’t forgo our roots in pursuit of the branches. I am extremely grateful for all that I have learned here from Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, Venerable Master Hua, students, teachers, and volunteers,.
上人一直強調要飲水思源,我非常感謝這裡的所有人,感謝佛菩薩,宣公上人我的,老師,同學和志工們。
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葉嘉雯(Karmen Yap):諸佛菩薩,宣公上人,各位法師,各位善知識:AMTF!我的名字叫葉嘉雯,法名親雯。我很榮幸今天可以在這裏和同學們一起跟大家分享我們在聖城求學的感想。如果有講得不如法的地方,請大家慈悲指正。
All Buddhas, Bodhisattvas, Venerable Master, all Dharma Masters, and all good knowing advisors, AMTF! My name is Karmen Yap, and I am honored to be here tonight along with my classmates, to share with everyone about my experience as a student here. If I have said anything that is not accord with the Dharma, please be kindly correct me.
在我小時候,我的父母送我到馬來西亞的紫雲洞觀音寺上幼兒園,那時候,我對佛法不了解,只知道在大殿的時候需要安靜,吃飯前要上供,在五觀堂的時候不能講話等等基本的禮貌。我記得那時候我會站在上人的相片前,看著他,心想他是不是在另一個地方很忙,所以暫時來不了馬來西亞?那時候,我根本不知道上人已經入涅槃了。當我從幼兒園畢業後,我以爲我再也沒有機會上打坐課了。
When I was little, my parents sent me to a kindergarten at Prajna Guanyin Sagely Monastery in Malaysia. During that time, I barely understood Buddhism. What I knew were basic manners like keeping quiet in the Bddha Hall, attending meal offerings before lunch, and not talking when eating in the Five Contemplations Hall. I remember standing in front of Venerable Master’s portrait and gazing at him for seconds while pondering if he was too busy somewhere to visit Malaysia. I never knew that Venerable Master had entered Nirvana. I graduated from the kindergarten later on, and I thought I would never have a chance to meditate anymore.
然而就在2011年的八月份,我連小學都還沒畢業,就收拾好行李,來到了萬佛聖城。當我抵達聖城的那一刻,我彷彿回到了家–一個我與朋友和家人共享的家。開始的幾年,雖然有點不適應可是在城裏的法師丶居士丶老師,和朋友們都很友善,也讓我慢慢適應了這裏的生活。在這裡上課,讓我有很多自我反省的機會。我彷彿手裏拿著一把放大鏡,看著我的毛病,也讓我明白自己需要改進的地方。
In August of 2011, I packed my luggage and came to the United States when I hadn’t even graduated from elementary school. When I arrived at the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas, I felt like I came back to home, one that I shared with my family and friends. Although I did not adapt to the environment here at the beginning, I am grateful for all Dharma Masters, all good knowing advisors, teachers, and friends, for giving me supports and for helping me to adapt after a while. While studying here, I had a lot of time to reflect upon my conduct. It often feels as if I carry a magnifying glass in my hands to identify clearly all of the problems I need to change over time.
我覺察得能在宣公上人的道場裡上學,是一件很幸福的事。有一位老時曾經對我說過,在聖城裡的每一位眾生都像南無大慈大悲千手千眼觀世音菩薩的其中一隻手一樣,我們齊心合力的護持著道場。當我聽見時,我有點內疚,因為我覺得自己沒有付出很多,反而有時身在福中不知福。
I am very blessed to attend schools founded by Venerable Master Hua. One of my teachers used to tell me that each of us here at CTTB represents each of the hands of The Thousand Hands and Thousand Eyes Great Compassionate Guan Shi Yin Bodhissatva, and that we come together to help each other, to maintain this place. When I heard that, I felt bad, because I don’t think I have contributed much. There were even times when I took my privilege for granted.
有一天,當我在接待從另一個學校來的學生們時,其中一位問起了為什麼聖城的路名都那麼特別。我說這些路名都是宣公上人爲聖城取的。那天當我放學後,我注意了我第一次落腳的地方,也就是宿舍外面的那條路。我驚訝地發現,它就叫布施路。我覺得宣公上人不僅要我學習多布施,也想讓我捨掉執著的心,不要太煩惱。當我每次擡頭看著聖城的天空時,我都會覺得很平靜,也有一種能使我心胸寬廣的感覺。另外我想感謝在聖城的每一個人,每一位法師和老師們的耐心教導,還有所有在廚房日夜奔波的法師與居士們。謝謝你們讓我明白做人的本分,也謝謝你們給我機會改變自己的毛病。
One time, I was giving a tour for a group of students who came here for class trip from another school. Then, one of the students asked me why the roads are named the way they are. I responded to him saying that our founder, Venerable Master Hua, named the streets. On that day after school, I paid attention to the name of the street where I first arrived, which is right between the dorm and the school. I was shocked when it said the “Giving Way.” I felt like Venerable Master Hua wanted me to not only practice giving, but also to tell me to “give away” or let go of my afflictions. Whenever I look up at the sky above CTTB, I feel at peace and it broadens my heart. Also, I would like to say thank you to everyone in CTTB, thank you all Dharma Masters and teachers for your patience in teaching me, and thank you all Dharma Masters and volunteers who work so hard at the kitchen for us. Thank you for teaching me how to be a human, and thank you for giving me chances to change my bad habits.
我很高興自己當初的選擇也很感謝父母的用心,還有他們爲我付出的一切;沒有他們,我就不會在這裏上學。還有三個月,我就要畢業了;即將進入大學的我,會把我在培德女中所學到的銘記在心。我也會記得宣公上人曾經說過的一句話,就是“Everything is okay!”一切都是最好的安排。
I am very glad that I had chosen to attend this school, and am very grateful for my parent’s effort and their contributions to my life. Without them, I would not have been able to come here. As I am entering college soon, I will bring what I learned from the Developing Virtue Girls School with me, and will not forget what Venerable Master Hua once said: “Everything is okay!” AMTF!
“I have been listening to many different years’ seniors being up here and talk about their experience with this place. And eventually, after five years, it is now my turn to be here and share my learning with everyone. ”
恍若昨日,恍若隔世。
得有多大的福宝,才能来到诸上善人汇聚的圣城,才能在此求学、成长 ,奠定此生人格和智识的底蕴。
善根深厚的孩子们,你们从小得到父母的呵护,又从小承载着父母殷切的期望,万里迢迢来接受佛法的教诲,受到善良高尚人格的熏陶,你们一定往昔也是总在呵护和启迪别人,才会如此。
生命无限,时空无限,至爱无限,你们从这里启航,这里也成为精神生命之根,灵魂的故乡。
飞吧, 展翅飞翔吧,万千江水万千天空,是你们的报化世界。
感谢这里在你们生命最宝贵阶段的给予和呵护。
南无阿弥陀佛!