李尊2024年12月21日（星期六）晚間講於萬佛聖城大殿

大家晚安，阿彌陀佛! 我是李尊, 在中國出生長大，在洛杉磯度過了我人生最重要的歲月，目前在三藩市工作。今天非常殊勝有這個機會和大家結法緣。我接觸佛法的時間遠不如在座各位的時間長，所以今天分享的淺見，歡迎大家指正，或和我分享您的見解。

Good evening, everyone, Amituofo. I am Peggy Li. I was born and raised in China. I spent my most formative years in Southern California, and currently I am working in San Francisco. I’m honored for the special opportunity to give the Dharma talk tonight. I was only introduced to Buddhism recently, a far less time than a lot of you here, so I would appreciate if you could correct my entry-level thoughts or share your insights.

我非常榮幸兩次深入了解佛法都是在彌陀七法會：去年和今年。如果要說這兩年最大的不同，那應該是：今年哭的遠比去年少。對此一開始我非常惶恐，尤其是聽到其他善知識哭，我在心裡想，為什麼我沒有哭，難道是我做錯了什麼事情，使今年我和阿彌陀佛的連結變少了嗎？我在心裡也問了佛很久，慢慢有一個答案變得清晰。我想我去年是在尋求原諒和垂憐，而今年則是在尋求信仰和啟示。去年剛接觸佛法，在法會期間大部分時間我都在懺悔人生中做的錯事和為身邊的人祈福，所以哭的更多些。今年開始誦阿彌陀佛時，我發心地想更多的一心誦佛，理解佛法。大概是「五濁」想的少了，哭的也就少了。今年我還學到，隨著修行，我們會感到更加平靜和愉悅，這種心情取代了我第一次經歷的悲傷。當然，我知道我仍然有很多業障和懺悔，需要日後長期努力。

I am very grateful that the two times I learned about Buddhism profoundly were both at the Amitabha birthday celebration and recitation session last year and this year. I would say the biggest difference between the two years would be that I cried much more last year than this year. Initially I was very unsettled about this. When I heard my fellow cultivators cry, I thought why am I not crying? Could it be that I did something so bad that Amitabha has taken away his blessing? I also asked this question to Amitabha in my heart, and slowly an answer became clear. I think I was seeking forgiveness and pity last year, and I am seeking faith and enlightenment this year. Last year when I was first introduced to Buddhism and the Amitabha recitation session, I spent a lot of my time repenting for my wrongdoings and praying for my family, and I cried more. However, when I started reciting Amitabha this year, I wanted to do so more single-mindedly and understand Buddhism better. Perhaps I thought less about the “five turbidities”, therefore I cried less. Also I learned, as we cultivate, we feel more equanimity and sympathetic joy, which replaced the grief that I experienced the first time. But, of course, I am aware I still have many karmic obstructions and repentances to be worked on for a long time.

我想分享的第二個領悟是「不要把自己浪漫化」這個概念，這個概念對我這個過度思考者非常有幫助。這個概念是包果勒居士在晚間課堂上分享的。很多時候我們認為自己是宇宙的中心；每個人都可能在評斷我們，有些事情會因為我們而發生或不會發生。這種以自我為中心的觀點造成了許多痛苦，而我們 90% 的痛苦都是映射出來的——我們從一個甚至不怎麼考慮或關心我們的世界中，映射出許多評判。果勒居士的這些話讓我感到非常自由；一旦我們把「自我」這個概念從我們習慣的敘述方式中剔除，那些敘述方式就不復存在了，痛苦也隨之消失。

The second insight I gained which I wish to share is the concept of “Don’t romanticize yourself.” This has been hugely helpful for me as an overthinker. This concept was shared by Doug during his evening class. A lot of times we think we are the center of the universe in which everyone could be judging us, and things will or will not happen because of us. T This ego-centric view creates a lot of suffering, and 90% of our sufferings are projected—we are projecting judgment from a world that doesn’t even think about or care much about us. Hearing this from Doug was extremely liberating; once we take the “self” out of the narratives, I realize those narratives cease to exist, so do sufferings.  

我想分享的第三個體會是「有求必應」。我第一次來這裡的時候，常聽到有人向阿彌陀佛或宣公上人發問並很快得到答案的故事。在這次法會期間，我幾乎每天都有許多這種經驗。例如，回到關於我哭泣的觀察，我在心裡問阿彌陀佛，是不是我的修行或與您的連結減弱了，所以我哭不出來了。昨天，在拜願的時候我忽然不受控制的哭了，甚至比第一次來這裡時哭得還要厲害。我覺得是阿彌陀佛在告訴我：「不，這不是因為你與我的連結減弱了，如果你想哭，你還是哭的出來的。只是今年你選擇了專注於與我建立一種不同的能量連結，所以現在眼淚少了。」

The third realization I wanted to share is, “ask, and you shall receive”. When I was here the first time, I used to hear stories of people asking questions to Amitabha or Master Hua, and they received a response in a short time. I experienced this first hand multiple times and almost every day during this session. For an example, going back to the observation about crying, I asked Amitabha a few days ago if my cultivation or connection with him has weakened and that’s why I’m not crying. Yesterday, I cried uncontrollably during the morning bowing, even harder than when I was here last year. I felt that Amitabha was telling me, “No, it is not because your connection with me has weakened; it is just you have chosen to focus on a different pursuit of relationship with me and a different energy connection; therefore, the tears are less.” 

今年我非常有幸在法會期間參加了不同的社區服務（出坡）。作為初學者，我透過這些社區服務找到了一個充滿關愛和鼓勵的組織和大家庭，同時讓我保持責任感和律己。所以，感謝知客師和善知識們歡迎我，尤其是法界大學推廣部的善知識們，讓我成為社區服務家庭的一份子，讓我有機會在學佛誦經之外，練習在平凡生活中的每一刻活在當下、保持正念。萬分感恩，阿彌陀佛!

Lastly, I have the blessing to participate in a different community service this year, which I am so grateful for. As a beginner in learning Buddhism, I found a caring and encouraging community through these services who keep me accountable and disciplined at the same time. So thank you, guest prefect and the good knowing friends, especially the good knowing friends at DRBU Extension, for welcoming me and allowing me to be part of the community service and giving me an opportunity to practice being present and mindful in every moment in this mundane life beyond the recitations. Thank you very much, Amituofo!