比丘尼恆青講於2023年9月14日星期四晚 萬佛城大殿
上人慈悲，各位法師，各位善知識：今天輪到恒青來跟大家結法緣。今天是很吉祥的日子，是地藏菩薩聖誕正日，也是虛雲老和尚的聖誕紀念日。
第一次有人向我介紹《地藏經》是在我七歲的時候，當時我和姐姐恒圓師在金輪寺參加Sunday school（育良週日學校）的課。上午的課程是學ㄅㄆㄇㄈ……來讀中文字；下午是關於佛教的課，因為我們比其他同學來得晚，老師已經在講《地藏經》了。
我記得我跟著父母去廟上，可是我沒有真的去學習佛法。不過，佛教課程的老師莊果南（Hetty Juang）給我留下了非常深刻的印象。因為這是我們上的第一堂課，他用《地藏經》的漫畫圖片，來介紹《地藏經》給我們這些小孩子聽。剛好是介紹〈地獄名號品第五〉，有很多眾生受果報，在地獄裡受苦。當時我在想：這個老師為什麼要給我們看這些有點恐怖的圖片？
然後，老師在白板上寫了三個字：貪、瞋、癡。其實我當時並不懂這三個字，但後來我當然明白了。今天是地藏法會第五天，就像昨天、前天很多法師在講法中有提到的，《地藏經》有很大一部分是講孝道，但也有很大一部分是講因果報應，說眾生造業就會受果報。這些果報是我們今天中午聽師父解釋的，它們是從我們眾生的貪瞋癡裡邊生出來的，生起妄想然後就造業等等。
我第一次誦《地藏經》是在我出家不久後。當時，我們五個小沙彌尼同住一個寮房，下殿後正準備安單，其他的三人已經休息了。我正要休息，就看到旁邊一個小沙彌尼還沒有準備睡覺，她還披著袈裟。我問她：「妳怎麼還不休息？」她說：「哦，我剛剛想到，今天是我父親的周年紀念日。」她看了我一眼，然後說：「可是我很累，妳可不可以幫我父親唸《地藏經》？」
我第一個念頭是不想唸，因為我那時候不會中文，如果我要唸的話，一定會唸很久；而且我們當時用的經本並不像現在這種容易唸的，它是很難翻閱，拼音都是大寫字母，非常難唸，至少對我來說是這樣。我知道如果我要誦經，肯定會誦得很夜，但我第二個念頭是，今天是她父親的紀念日，很重要，我應該幫她誦經，所以我就答應了。果不其然，我唸到隔天凌晨兩點多。
雖然我自己是修觀音法門，可是我最常誦的經典、幾乎每天誦的經典卻是《地藏經》，這是很奇妙的。前幾天有一位講法者說到，有時候會有種種的因緣，它不是推你去唸這部經，而是讓你有因緣去唸這部經。這就好像，我出家不久，當時帶領我們的老師，我記得是她父親往生了，她就對我們小沙彌尼說：「因為這是我私人的事情，我不能要求妳們一定要這樣做，不過如果妳們有時間的話，能不能在這四十九天，每天幫我家人唸兩品的《地藏經》？」我們都很聽話，每天下殿之後就幫忙唸兩品。
可是就在四十九天快結束的時候，我的祖母往生了，我爸爸就把我祖母和祖父的骨灰帶回聖城，安置在往生堂裡。於是我們互相問，也問老師：「四十九天快結束了，我們還要繼續誦經嗎？」我們說就繼續唸！所以我們每天就唸兩品或三品或一卷，反正每天晚上就繼續唸。
當四十九天的唸誦即將結束時，我們其中的一位小沙彌尼，她的舅舅往生了，所以我們互相問：「要不要繼續唸呢？」就繼續唸。
在我的印象中，我不知道是什麼因緣，《地藏經》就唸了好幾個月。每一位幫他們唸完四十九天，幾個月過去了，我們也唸習慣了，所以就互相問：「要不要繼續唸？」我們就繼續唸。
後來，不是所有人，而是我們有幾位就開始每天以誦《地藏經》作為功課之一。我不知道其他人唸了多久，但我自己唸了至少二十年的《地藏經》。
其實我們在日常做的功課是非常重要，可是我們也知道，我們眾生是很容易懶散的，至少我是很容易懶散。經過一段時間，我們可能會習慣安逸了，就開始懶散，所以我們需要不同的因緣來激勵，比如參加打七，至少可以讓我重新整頓一下我的身心，抖擻我的精神，來修行。
坦白說，我們打七的時間表，安排得非常好。你看！我們有誦經、念佛、坐念，這就是讓我們的身心可以安靜下來。我們平日如果不是忙工作就是忙生活事，是很難找到一個特別的時間，來讓我們可以把心靜下來，可以不打那麼多的妄想。
五年前，我雖然出家很久了，但不知道為什麼，有一段開示也許我聽過忘了或沒注意聽，就是聽到師父說第一次誦《地藏經》的經驗時，就像聽到新的開示一樣。師父說，第一次得到這本《地藏經》的時候，非常高興，所以每天中午就在佛前跪著誦《地藏經》，而且直接跪在地上，沒有墊東西。這樣誦《地藏經》一段時間後，就遇到了障礙，有些同參不知道是嫉妒還是什麼，就說：「你這是故意在那裡表現。」所以師父就沒有在佛前跪著誦《地藏經》了。
因為當年是在地藏七灑淨之前所聽到的開示，所以我就忽然間有一個發心、一個意念：我想學學師父。我不是發願，只是決定在打七那個禮拜內要唸一百零八部《地藏經》，而且我要學師父跪在地上誦經，膝蓋上不墊任何東西。
我們那時候開始打七了，當然也和現在打七的時間表是差不多一樣，早上七點到下午五點，外加我們日常的功課（早課、午供、晚課、聽經、誦楞嚴咒心）。所以我只能在早課前凌晨兩點開始誦《地藏經》，早課後繼續誦經，中午再誦，結齋後再誦，當天法會後再誦，晚上再誦到十二點多。
誦到第五天，我的膝蓋真是痛。我小時候曾被罰跪好多小時，本來應該不會痛的，可是不知道為什麼，這次卻真的很痛。所以第五天晚上誦完經後，我發現我的膝蓋腫得很大，說實話，我從不知道長跪是可以把膝蓋跪腫了。但我覺得我不該想這個膝蓋痛，因為只剩下兩天，我要把這個願望圓滿了。
師父並沒有講他的膝蓋有腫起來，那為什麼我的膝蓋會腫？誦完《地藏經》之後，我的膝蓋整整腫了三個多禮拜，腫得很厲害，後來腫就消了。所以說，真的，師父就是師父，凡夫就是凡夫。
透過誦《地藏經》的經驗，我體會到，真的，有時候我們確實需要不同的因緣。好比，我們有不同的因緣來推著我們去做某件事情，無論是好是壞，都是各有因緣。有時候也會有不好的事情發生，這也可以說就是業障，就有種種因緣讓我們去做某些事。可是我們也可以創造因緣，有時候你因緣來了，你不想去做，那個因緣也就沒了；或是沒有這個因緣，你也可以去創造這種機會，讓我們自己的身心可以得到一些整頓。
比如我們這次的打七，很多人可能有其他的事情或工作因素就不能來打七，雖然這個打七因緣在，但是他們卻沒有辦法參加，所以這個因緣在今年對他們而言就不會再有了。有時候，真的，正如我前邊所說，我們凡夫很容易懶散，很容易打妄想，我們是需要有這樣的善因緣來幫助我們的身心，無論是其他的因緣推我們這樣做，或是我們自己創造出這些因緣。
今年，我非常高興可以在萬佛聖城參加地藏七法會。雖然我的因緣不是那麼具足，因為我需要在學校教書，所以沒辦法參加全程，但我真的希望以後可以有機會參加全程的地藏七。阿彌陀佛！
English9-14-DM Heng Ching
It was also the first time I was introduced to the so-called three poisons in Buddhism. At that time, I didn’t understand why he wrote these three words on the board. But of course, I understand why now. The Earth Store Sutra, as Dharma speakers mentioned yesterday and in the previous days in their talks, is a sutra of filial piety, because it does indeed emphasize filial piety and filial practice. But another big part of the sutra— I’m sure people have noticed as today is the fifth day of the session—is cause and effect. Living beings create evils and undergo the according retribution. Even the Master said in today’s evening lecture that we living beings create afflictions and false thoughts that make us do evil actions, and they all come from our greed, hatred, and delusion. So I do know now why Zhuang Gwo Nan wrote those three words on the board.
The first time I actually recited the entire Earth Store Sutra was not too long after left the home life. At that time, there was a group of young shamanerikas and the five of us lived in one room. After the Buddha Hall ceremonies and rituals were over in the evening, we went back to our room and three of the girls were getting ready to rest. I was actually preparing to take my rest as well, and then I saw that the shamanerika next to me was still wearing her sash. She wasn’t even preparing to rest and I asked her why she wasn’t getting ready. She told me that she just had remembered that it was her father’s anniversary of his death. Then she turned to me and said, “But I’m really tired. So can you read it on behalf of me for my father?” My first thought was that I didn’t really want to agree to recite the sutra, because at that time I actually didn’t know Chinese and I knew that if I were to recite it, it would be a very long process. Also, at that time we used a different printed version of the sutra text. It was in a big thick red cover that was really hard to hold open. Also, all the pinyin phonetics were capitalized, so it was really difficult for me to recite. So I didn’t want to do it. But then my second thought was that it was such an important day and that we should recite the Earth Store Sutra for him and so I agreed to do it.
It took me until the next day, until past 2 AM to finish. Actually, I personally cultivate the Guan Yin Dharma door, but for some reason the sutra that I recite the most is the Earth Store Sutra. Just a few days ago, one of the Dharma speakers shared how when she first recited the Earth Store Sutra there were some conditions that sort of pushed or allowed her to recite the sutra, and I actually have a similar experience.
There are some conditions that push you to do things. So this also happened not long after I left the home life. At that time, our guardian Dharma master’s relative passed away, I believe it was her father. She told us that because it was her personal affairs, she didn’t want to force us to help her relative recite a sutra, but if we had the time and energy, we could recite two rolls of the Earth Store Sutra for her relative every day. Thus, after all the day ceremonies were finished, we went to the nun’s small Buddha hall and recited two rolls of the Earth Store Sutra. When the 49 days were almost over for my guardian’s relative, my paternal grandmother died. My father brought her and my paternal grandfather’s ashes back to CTTB. And so we asked each other whether or not we should continue reciting now for my grandmother who just passed. We decided to continue reciting. when those 49 days, the second set of 49 days was almost over, One of the shamanerika’s uncle died. And so we asked again each other whether we should continue reciting the sutra. And again we decided to continue reciting it. In my memory, we just recited the Earth Store Sutra for very a long time. After we finished reciting the sutra for everyone, a few months had passed, and we had gotten into the habit of reciting the Earth Store Sutra. We asked each other should we continue reciting it? We decided to continue to recite it. But it was not everyone from our group continued, just a few of us started to recite the Earth Store Sutra as one of our daily cultivation practices. And I’m not sure how long the other people continued with this Dharma door, but I kept it for around 20 years.
As we know, it is really important to have and to persist in your cultivating of a Dharma door as a daily practice, but sometimes as living beings, at least for myself, after a while you get really comfortable with your lifestyle, especially if everyday is almost the same, and then you start to get laxed. Therefore sometimes we need different kinds of conditions to really shake us into action, to have a revival of our bodies and minds. One of those kinds of conditions is actually participating in a session.
Actually, if you look at our session schedule, it’s really, really wonderful, because we recite the sutra, we recite the Buddhas or Bodhisattvas name as we circumambulate the Buddha Hall and we also sit in silent recitation. This gives us a time to calm our minds and focus because usually we’re so busy with work or with our everyday lives that we can’t actually calm our minds at all, and to have a special time to do that is actually a very valuable experience for me.
It was around five years ago, although I left home for quite a while, when I heard Shrfu (the Master) retelling his experience when he first encountered and read the Earth Store Sutra, I felt as if I heard it for the first time. He said that when he read it, he was extremely happy; he was so happy about this wondrous Dharma that he decided to kneel on the floor without anything below his knees and recite the Earth Store Sutra every day once the Dharma assemblies were over. But then his karma obstacle came. Some people thought that he was showing off, and so he stopped it. I heard this on the day before we purified the boundaries of that year’s Earth Store Session, and I all of a sudden had this thought that I really wanted to emulate Shrfu’s actions and recite 108 times of the Earth Store Sutra within the week of the Earth Store session. And I wanted to emulate Shrfu’s spirit in that I would be kneeling on the floor without anything beneath. During that session, I had to recite before the morning ceremony, after the morning ceremony, during lunchtime, after lunchtime, after the session was over, and in the evenings at night until midnight in order to fulfill this wish of mine. When I was a kid, I was punished a lot and needed to kneel for the duration of an incense stick. As a result, I could kneel for many hours, but on the fifth day of that recitation session, I didn’t know why, but all of a sudden my knees were hurting excruciatingly. After I finished my recitation that day, I looked at my knees, and saw that they were really enlarged and big. I never knew that your knees swell because of the kneeling, because Shrfu never said that his knees swelled. But it’s probably because I am just a mundane, regular person. When I finished my 108 recitation of the sutra that week, my knees were very swollen and the swelling didn’t go away until after more than three weeks later. It’s obviously that the Master is on a different level up level than I am.
From my experience of reciting the Earth Store Sutra, I really realized that sometimes in life or in our cultivation path, we have a lot of conditions that push us to do something, whether it’s in the good way or in the bad way. One way to see this is that this force might be our karma that is pushing us toward a direction. Sometimes this is not within our control, but sometimes if we don’t actually do anything about it, or if we don’t really want to do it, that condition will sort of go away.
For example, right now we have this Earth Store session, and some people will try to attend a lot and some people, for various reasons or work, might not be able to attend. This condition that is here but whether or not we participate in it is up to us. We can also create our own conditions, but this you have to actually do it in order to really help our bodies and minds to work on cultivation. This is important, because as I mentioned earlier, as mundane living beings, we can easily fall into our bad habits. Although it seems that this year we have fewer people participating in the session, maybe because we just reopened, I’m really happy that I can attend the Earth Store Session this year at CTTB. However, this year my conditions are not as complete, because I have to teach at the girls school, and I can’t participate in the entire session. But I really hope that in the near future, I can participate in the entire session.